My fellow Americans:

Salute these real recipes from real congresspeople, recreated with love and fear by me.

Do not try these at home.

Senator Dianne Feinstein's "Easy Tamale Pie"

Senator Dianne Feinstein's "Easy Tamale Pie"

I recently mixed up a batch of this “easy” tamale pie on NBC Los Angeles — the lovely host, Danielle Nottingham, asked if I could make it in 30 seconds. Absolutely I could, and absolutely you can. The easiest pie ever, none of those silly conrmeal crusts or organic ingredients like real tamale pies.

Dianne Feinstein

Chef Dianne Feinstein

Democratic Senator from California

As always, I followed the recipe word for word directly from the senator who died of old age while still in office, no alterations:

INGREDIENTS

2 cups cooked spaghetti

1 medium can of chili con carne

1 medium can of tamales, with paper removed and tamales cut into several pieces

1 small can creamed corn

1 small can black olives, cut in half

INSTRUCTIONS

1) Mix above ingredients together and place in casserole dish.

Like I said — you can absolutely do this in 30 seconds. And sure, the canned chili con carne may look like dog food, but it smells like plain meat.

2) Top with shredded Monterey jack cheese. Cover and bake at 350 degrees for 40 minutes.

Foil it up and cross your fingers.

Dianne Feinstein's Easy tamale pie

Voila! If you want to actually watch me attempt to eat it, go to the CwC Instagram or TikTok. Or hey, watch me make it on NBC! That’d be neat. Visually, it’s not much to look at. The noodles peak out from underneath a hood of cheese thick enough to be a pizza topping. Is it Italian? Is it Mexican? Is it Texan? No. It is Feinsteinian, and it’s the easiest tamale pie you’ll ever make.

 

Verdict:

It’s not pretty, and I’ll say that I do not consider this “pie.” But I did eat it for a few days as a VERY heavy lunch, and I’m not completely upset about the way this dish appealed to my childhood love of canned raviolis.

Senator Feinstein's easy tamale pie recipe
Representative Lawrence Smith's "Applesauce Jello Mold"

Representative Lawrence Smith's "Applesauce Jello Mold"

Cookin' with Congress on NBC Los Angeles!

Cookin' with Congress on NBC Los Angeles!